Just When I Was Over My Fear...

I realize that having a baby WILL put you in the projects.

I've always had this irrational fear that I'd end up living in the projects if I had a baby.

See... My dad used this lie to scare the crap out of me and keep me from having babies at a young age. Even after I graduated from grad school, began a career, got married, and bought a house, I was still afraid to come off birth control in order to have a baby.

After trying to conceive for a year and actually getting pregnant, I relaxed and started to believe that having a baby is cool.

Well... after having to spend all this up-front money to get prepared to bring a baby home, I'm starting to believe that there was some truth to my dad's story.

Get this:

Maternity clothes = $400
Mini Crib = $300
The travel system (stroller and carseat) = $220
Additional car seat base = $50
The glider = $250-$300
A bedding set for the mini-crib = $200
The bedding set and mattress for the cradle = $50
Outta pocket insurance estimate = $975!!!
Birthing classes = $200

Dude! We're gonna totally be in the projects before this is over!

But I will admit that having a baby is PRICELESS!

Can't Fight Cravings

I love food! Like... if I could marry food, I would. Actually, I married Zack because he cooked all the time and loves to eat like I do.

I just assumed that I would have the craziest cravings once I got pregnant, but I have not. I don't crave pickles and ice cream, peanut butter and pork chops, or anything else gross sounding...

But even still... every once in a while, I get the urge to eat something particular.

A few weeks ago, I craved Popeyes chicken... a two piece (white) spicy with cajon rice and a biscuit with honey. The lady at the drive through barely asked me what I wanted before I yelled my order into the drive through box. It took every ounce of will power within me to keep from tearing into the chicken box on the way back to the house. Needless to say... once I sat down in front of the tv and set my meal up on the tv tray, I became a lioness feasting after a kill.

Lately, I've been totally on a Pizza Hut kick. I ask Zack every day if he wants a pizza from the hut, and everyday he says "no". I was telling my mother how he felt, and then I mentioned that I'd be cool with a bowl of marinara sauce and some pepperonis to dip in it.

Zack kept urging me to eat veggies but my body doesn't want them. So... because he refused to eat pizza with me, I went with a good friend of mine who was more than happy to indulge in my need for marinara sauce.

When we got to the Pizza Hut buffet, we indulged in all kinds of pizza, and I was sure to drizzle my slices with EXTRA marinara sauce...

Talk about heaven!!!!!

Improvising

This is what happens when your pants are too tight to button or zip and its too hot outside to wear the belly band. I got the idea from a supervisor at work who said she used to loop a rubber band around the button and button hole. I upgraded the idea to use a elastic hair band.

Its actually pretty comfortable!

P.S. Please excuse the partial view of my bra :-S

Avocado!

Today, at 15 weeks and 1 day, our baby is an AVOCADO!

I'll admit that I'm not a huge fan of avocados because they're oily and flavorless, and to be honest, I had never heard of or seen avocados until I was grown and out of grad school. I don't think people in the hood do too much cooking with them... I doubt the local grocery stores sell them in East Point.

Either way, I feel like I have an avocado tucked away in my stomach... I'm uncomfortable sleeping or lying on my stomach, and I can't eat as fast or as much as I did during the first trimester.

I welcome it because some day soon we'll be a watermelon!

Sometimes They Come Back

I generally have "good" skin. I don't usually get breakouts, nor does my skin react to different chemicals and stuff. I typically wash my face with Biore face scrub once every week or two but can pretty much get away with splashing my face with water.

I didn't even have many breakouts as a teenager, and when I did, it was only one pimple on the side of my nose or in the middle of my forehead. I treated those pimples with toothpaste in order to make them dry up and go away.

But now???


My forehead is constantly broken out with little bumps that are sensitive to sweat, sun, and my beloved Biore face scrub. If I'm outside for more than 30 minutes and start sweating, my face feels like its on fire.

These hormones have my face screwed up!

Who Likes Surprises?

Not me... generally...

But we've decided to keep the baby's sex a surprise. The decision to do so has really been like a playground see-saw with Zack on one side and me on the other.

Initially, Zack was all about keeping the sex a surprise until delivery, but I was all like, "But people won't know what to get us for the shower!"

Then... Zack was like, "I can't wait to find out what we're having so that we can paint the baby's room and start buying stuff!"... I, at the time, was indifferent and feeling a little under pressure at the fact that we were actually gonna have a baby.

A few weeks after that, I really started feeling that we should keep it a surprise. I talked to Zack about it, and he was indifferent.

Then finally.....

We talked about it, and I remembered the argument given by a co-worker who was keeping her baby's sex a surprise.

IF PEOPLE KNOW WHAT YOU'RE HAVING, THEY'LL ALL GET YOU GENDER SPECIFIC CLOTHING AND TOYS, AND YOU WON'T HAVE ANY OF THE THINGS YOU ACTUALLY NEED FOR A BABY. AND... YOU'LL BE SO SUPER EXCITED DURING DELIVERY TO GET YOUR BABY OUT TO FIND OUT WHAT YOU'RE HAVING!

Because the truth is, we want to get gifts we can actually use like bottles, onesies for different stages, and other stuff, and I'll need all the motivation I can get to deal with labor (because, truthfully, I don't even handle cramps very well)

I'm sure I'll purchase plenty of clothes after the baby is born, and even more clothes will be given to us by grandparents and family.

So, If you like surprises... the sex of our kid will definitely be one to enjoy!!!

Screw You, RH!!!

Yeah... How about Restoration Hardware called me yesterday evening, not long after my post about the crib, to tell me that the crib was sold out and that they weren't going to charge me for it...

Talk about PISSED!!!!!

Patrick wakes me up out my nap to apologize and tell me that they didn't have my beloved crib. In order to keep from raging out on this poor sale/customer service rep, I told him to cancel the entire order and to have a nice evening.

I've been searching online for a comparable crib but haven't even come close to the one I loved and I REFUSE to pay $1300 for the only other Expresso colored crib at RH...

So...

SCREW YOU, RH!!!! Screw you for your inability to update your website in a timely enough manner to reflect what you actually have in stock! Screw you for sending me a confirmation email for the crib then calling me three days later to tell me you don't have it. Screw you for forcing me to buy something I don't want!!!

Big Purchase

We ordered the baby's crib!!! We got it on Clearance!!!!!!!!! AND... It will continue to grow with our kid until he or she moves out!!!!



The crib converts to a toddler bed and then converts again into a headboard for a twin or full bed! We love it and can't wait for it to arrive!!!

So long... For now...

So long (for now) to my dreams of having Janet Jackson's abs... *sad face*

The other day, I had scheduled to tutor a student, and as I got dressed, I realized that all... ALL of my jeans are tight in the butt and unbuttonable in the waist. I ended up wearing a pair of pants and looping a rubberband around the button and button hole in order to hold them up. I completed the look with a long shirt.

Just yesterday, I was getting ready for a get together at my neighbor's home, and nothing fit... Not even the beautiful gray silk Ann Taylor skirt I bought two months ago on a mini shopping spree. Oh, I was so hurt because I'd just said, "I will wear this skirt today so that I can at least say that I wore it once."

But nope! I squeezed the skirt over my hips and cussed loudly when I realized that wearing that skirt would become a tragedy.

So what do we do???

Zack and I gather up our garage sale money and attempt to go on a maternity clothes shopping spree...

Long story short... We went to three stores and came home with a pair of khakis, two pairs of jeans, and 4 t-shirts. The selections were piss poor at best! I never knew that the maternity sections at Target, Kohls, and Old Navy were so crappy, but they are!

We bought a "belly band" and will hope for the best... we're also gonna do some shopping online which definitely seems to be the way to go.

I look in the mirror at myself, and although I don't see myself as fat, I do somewhat lament over the fact that I won't have the opportunity to get dancer's abs until the Spring... Zack however, oogles over the fact that my stomach is growing, and he literally lights up like a Christmas tree over the sight. He's now to the point that he rubs my stomach and kisses it... it is horribly cute!

If You Were Mine

Dear little kid at the Drs office,

I see you! I hear your little voice! I'm watching you and you know that. As a matter of fact, I've been giving you the stank eye ever since you came hollering talking and playing through the door. Into an office that is peaceful and dim and relaxing.

I've watched you look for your "aldigader" and climb the wall at the sign in desk. I've even watched you spin in circles holding a bag of chips just to fall to the floor and make a mess. Oh, how I wish you were mine!

You're loud and busy-bodied... And I can just imagine your mother seeking a diagnosis of ADHD so that you'll receive special treatment when you're one day attending my class. And I already know the frustration I'll (or some other unfortunate teacher) will have trying to get you to do your homework. I know your mom will make all kinds of excuses for you when all it takes is something right now... While you're three. I wish you were mine... Right this moment.

You're climbing on everything and people are laughing at you... No wait... They're laughing and judging your incompetent mother. And me? I'm not laughing because I don't think it is funny or cute. I just want to say to your mother, "Hey!!! Hey lady with the wild child!!! You need to straighten him out and make him sit down and shut up!" but I won't do that because I'm only here for a few minutes and don't want to have to "show out" if your mother acts a fool like you.

But I tell you what... I wish you were mine because I would sit you down in a chair and whisper firmly in your ear that "you better sit your tail down RIGHT NOW in a chair and close your mouth or else we're gonna take a trip to the lady's room," and if you fail to comply, I'd scoop you up and take you there and introduce your backside to a belt. Afterwards, I would explain why punishment was handed down, explain what will happen if you still don't get yourself together, tell you to clear up your face, and walk back into the waiting room... quietly.

Why would I spank you? Because my mother and father did it to me and I was always a good kid. I don't see why it wouldn't work for you! But anyway...

Since you're not mine, I'll just keep giving you the stank eye and find comfort in the fact that my kid will know better.

Sincerely,

The lady sitting two seats over

On this Eve...

I can't freakin believe that this day is the eve of our 2nd trimester... Yes! We've already completed 12 weeks of a smooth pregnancy. The only issue I have is waking up feeling like I haven't eaten in three days, visiting the toilet three times in the middle of every night, and extreme fatigue (which I believe has now turned into laziness- but who cares).

My husband has gone into super overdrive mode and has started preparing the house for a baby by painting and rearranging things and getting rid of things (he was previously attached to) for our upcoming garage sale. He is shocking the crap out of me! Seriously, he is getting rid of the DVD stand and all the DVDs!!! Now, I just gotta work on getting him to let go of the VHS tapes in the upstairs closet.

I haven't been cursed by the evil morning sickness witch nor have I been constipated like so many women. I eat what I want, and I sleep all day.... Life is great!

I can even feel the baby's (who is now about three inches long and about the size of a peach) movements every once in a while. It doesn't feel like anything really... It doesn't feel like gas or anything else related to digestion. It happens right above the pelvic bone and close to the front of my belly. I first felt it at tennis practice. We were doing drills and as I ran to the back of the line and stopped, it felt like some thing (not "something") bumped and slid across the front of my stomach. Then it stopped and happened again for like two seconds. The best way to describe it is to say that it is like the feeling you get in your stomach after going over the first drop of a roller coaster. If you sneeze or aren't paying attention, you'll miss it. I started looking for it after our last doctor's visit. She told me that I could probably feel movement but would overlook it because this is my first pregnancy and would not know what the feeling was.

Even though we're entering the 2nd trimester, I don't have the urge to post news of the pregnancy (although I thought I would) on Facebook and probably won't until 20 weeks (sometime in September). We've started taking belly pictures... we'll we've taken two. Some people look at me (generally family) and will say that I have a bump, but really... any real change in my body can be attributed to me eating hamburgers and fries. My stomach, however, has pudged out just an itty bitty bit primarily because my uterus has moved up and little.

On this eve of our second trimester, I still can't really believe we're pregnant, and that is probably due to the fact that we don't exactly look pregnant yet. It is still pretty amazing that there are two heartbeats within my body and that my body is creating another person with fingers, toes, a nose, and a heart. It really is nothing short of a miracle.

So... We're 12 weeks down with 28 more!