Wednesday, February 2, 2011


I would like to announce that it only took three weeks after having my baby for me to lose all of my baby weight (plus two pounds, but who's counting), and I would like to thank breastfeeding for my success.

I look in the mirror and notice that my stomach (uterus) has deflated and is about a month or two away from its original state... maybe. Point is... I can wear my prepregnancy jeans with no problem.

Then I turn around...

and wonder where the hell my butt went!

It, along with my belly, ravenous appetite, and swelling in my feet and hands, has deflated to no azz at all. Now, I realize that I never had a ghetto booty like Kim Kardashian, but I did have a little junk in the trunk going on.

I was walking in the kitchen, and my husband so kindly pointed out that I was "losing my butt" and he was sorta sad about it. My unspoken response, "Kiss my azz... whatever is left of it!"

I'm not super concerned because a smaller butt is something that can be plumped up with cobbler, cakes, and good southern food... all of which I am very fond!

The only obstacle is how to eat those things without adding the plumpness to my arms, thighs, gut, and face...

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